Rated L for 'Lime'! It's "My Pet"!

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Rated L for 'Lime'! It's "My Pet"!

Post by Laughing_Man on 9/27/2009, 8:22 am

A/N: This was a request before anyone calls me a pervert! It's the people of FF.NET who are perverted! D:

Master and Commander

As an empath, Raven could read easily the darkest thoughts and most secret urges the befell those around her. Even Robin, her stone-faced leader, trained by Batman to be as closed off and secretive as possible, was an open book to her. The early exposure to direct feedback of mankind's more base desires had been a strange thing, as a child she could never truly comprehend the power and depth strong emotions held, nor could she appreciate the lucrative opportunities that awaited those with control held over those without. When she was raised it was difficult to hide things from her, to lie would only breed more fear and confusion, something they could not afford. So they were brutally honest. And it was terrifying.

To truly feel the emotions of another, to be so open to their rage, their passion, their sorrow, their pain. It is not a thing to be treated lightly, each feeling, each euphoric sensation or crippling agony not only held you in as much a grip as they, it strangely managed to isolate you from it, the strangest sensation, she could remember, like chocolate teasing her tongue. When she had first truly felt her mothers love for her, as a child, held in her arms, cradled gently, itty bitty. The taste had been so sweet. Later, when the world no longer consisted of her and her mother, she remembered the feelings of hate and fear the others had for her, the burning stares physically pierced her soul. It had almost killed her. Yet , she endured, held on by that chocolate sensation in the peripherals of her senses.

She could never taste it, never truly. She could only gaze upon it, inhale the sweet scent and let it's flowing softness melt through her, to look upon it, and never touch. Never taste. Never know what it was, to truly know.

She remembered, the first time her mother told her about sex. About relationships, it had confused her greatly. No thanks to the isolation she suffered, no thanks to her damned state. She had been told she could never have a partner. She could never take a husband, or even a more short-term courtship. The risk was far too great, and the consequences far too dire. But her mother had saw fit to grace her with knowledge anyway, in her own words, what should happen, and what does happen, are often very different. So she had laid out some rules, a code, an easy do-it-yourself set of instructions.

"Men", she had begun. "Desire one thing, it is not a bad thing, in fact some would say it is actually something quite enjoyable, but their single fixation on it, is dangerous." Raven already knew what she meant, she had been educated on biology and human mating before, she knew what went where and why, how it happened and why it happened, what it meant, spiritually and physically. She could never have 'it'. Another check on the list of things she would never truly know. "If you ever find a suitor you deem acceptable, someone you feel so strongly for that you cannot deny your convictions and find yourself powerless to prevent yourself from flinging your heart to them in hopes they hold out a hand to catch it, there are certain things you must do, for both yours, and their sakes. Don't fear man's thirst, it is a normal desire, it is born of a longing ingrained within heir DNA and psychology to facilitate the survival of the species. They desire it, no matter how much you may think them 'above' such things, they want it. Because it is natural, because it feels right. Because they probably think they love you. And you have to be stronger than them, you have to show them..."

---

The candles in Ravens room flicked and danced with the gentle breeze that whispered in from her open window, her cloak swayed rhythmically to the whims of the wind. She floated, serene and calm, cross-legged, silent. A tapping at her door broke her trance, and she stood eagerly. She had been preparing, she was ready, it was now or never, do or die. She pulled the door aside with her powers, and the small shadow that stood proudly in the hallways light, grinned at her.

"Ready Rae?" Beast Boy cheerily asked in a sing-song voice. Happy to have finally gotten the T-Car from Cyborg for a night. His deeper thoughts bubbled to the surface at the sight of Raven, her costume replaced with a strangely familiar vision of her civilian attire, Jean short hot pants and a black longline gypsy scoop top. The black fabric hanging loosely from her, the cold air on her neck as she removed her cloak, and tossed it aside. He was wearing his costume. Her cloak she had simply kept for traditions sake, she found it easier to meditate and focus when enshrouded so.

Another surge of emotion as she strolled towards him, she saw his eyes scanning up and down her figure, her exposed legs (that he had always been a fan of) and her exposed neck gave a reaction that caused him to eagerly lick his lips, before snapping to attention and hoping that Raven hadn't noticed his slip. She smiled. "When you are" She stepped past him, linking her arm in his.

"You want me to go change? I didn't think we'd-"

"It's fine, we're just going for a drive" She said, her voice cold and commanding, Beast Boy entertained predictions of bad news only momentarily. Raven had been so much more open with him lately it was strange to see her once more withdrawn into her shell of stoic self-preservation.

"Is something wrong?" He asked more out of politeness than true concern, anything dire would no-doubt have been mentioned by now.

"No, I just feel..." She turned her head to him, cocking it slightly to the side. "Like doing something exiting" She said in a dangerously flirtatious voice. He turned to butter then and there, his eyes lighting up and swelling with intrigue and wanting, he held her closer to him as they walked. She felt heavenly, light yet strong, a perfect porcelain doll of power. A strange mix of power and vulnerability that was oh so enticing to him. He eyed the exposed flesh of her neck, her skin dull and grey yet so perfect and clean, so clear, like a pool of moonlight. He licked his lips again, and once more mentally criticized himself. The Beast inside him was a wild one, but he was still human, still in control. He hoped.

---

For a while it had been quiet, the drive was uneventful and they simply cruised at a leisurely pace throughout the city, the lights sounds and ambience of the city seemed to move with them, to flow around them in an all-singing all-dancing parade of light. She gazed out the window, focusing once more. What was about to be done had to be done. Not for cruelty, not for some strange need to dominate and control, but sheer necessity. Or so she told herself. She pretended to listen to her boyfriends yammering, he droned on and on about subjects that she had little interest in or care for, yet she enjoyed the sound of his voice, especially when he talked to her about things she knew no-one else had heard.

"...And then it turned out that species really IS hermaphroditic, needless to say, I walked away with ALL the sponges. Now whenever I hear the words "Itchy triangle" I can't help but laugh, so that should explain what happened this morning with the whole "Pancake" incident." He finished and smiled warmly at her. She made a note to remember the ending and find out what, exactly, he was talking about. Of all the times he chooses to tell an actually interesting story she had to dose off. "What's wrong?" He asked upon seeing her expression, she wasn't smiling back (but that itself was a rare instance), she wasn't doing that strange half-smile she more often directed at him, she was simply looking through him.

"Nothing... Hey Beast Boy... You... think I'm sexy don't you?" She asked, putting on her best 'come hither' voice. It sent shudders down her spine, she felt so uncomfortable doing this.

"Umm... Yeah I mean, you're beautiful, why'd you-" The question was strange to him, she knew exactly how he felt about her looks, and had even teased him about it on several occasions. Not that he disliked the direction this conversation was going in, but it was more than a little distracting. He was driving as best he could, and even he admitted that he was a bad driver at the best of times, controlling the vehicle required nearly full attention, which was why he chose conversations he knew would be tame and uneventful.

"I didn't ask if you thought I was beautiful, do you think I'm sexy?" She asked, undoing her seat-belt, he started to ask her why but she cut him off again. "When you look at me, what does that Beast inside you think?" He blushed knowing the answer all too well, she leaned over to him, putting one arm on his shoulder, she put on leg over him to rest between his, and put her remaining hand on his thigh. He choked back a gasp and did his best to avoid eye contact.

"Well... He thinks you're very... Pretty" He wheezed out, she was nearly straddling him now, he could see her out the corner of his eye, looking him up and down as her hands roamed across him, he was confused and scared now, this wasn't Raven, she didn't do this. He didn't notice he was speeding until the alert sounded and the T-car shifted into battle mode automatically, his speed indicating imminent conflict. The canon rose from the hood, threatening everyone in front of them.

"You think about it all the time don't you? I can taste your dirty mind a mile away." She hissed, smiling now at his reaction as he floored the gas and the car sped down the road, his knuckles were turning white from his vice-like grip on the wheel.

"I don't think-"

"What would you do to me?" She asked, a dry playfulness in her words, she sighed mentally, inwardly humiliated by her display, she kept going spurred on only by the words of her mother. She leaned closer and whispered in his ear, making sure her breath tickled him. "What do you want to do to me?"

He felt one of her hands caress his face, and her breath failed to subside from his ear, instead he now felt the sensation of her teeth chewing his earlobe, gently nibbling his flesh. The car was going insanely fast now, and he had managed to change course to a motor-way somehow. His mind wasn't working, he was lock-jawed, sheer cold panic consumed him, not Raven, this was just some terrible (wonderful) nightmare (dream).

Her hand traced his inner thigh as she continued gasping like a hungry animal as her legs tightened across him. "We could do anything you want, I know you'd love it, that Beast inside you, I want to see the real animal you are" She moaned. Inside she felt like some slut, degrading herself in this way. All for the good of us both. She kept repeating to herself. "It's only natural.... Garfield, we're going to do horrible things together, horrible sweaty dirty things" Now her hand moved to his groin and gripped him, cupped with only the barest trace of hostility.

"Rae!" He gasped, she controlled how fast the car went with how hard she squeezed him. "You're not-"

"I'm not what?" She asked tightening her grip on him, he murmured a high pitched note before he realized he was once again driving through the streets, and narrowly avoiding driving the car into a ditch. "I'm you master now," She said, forcefully, a hint of her old self returning.

"...Yes Ma'am" He groaned, leaning back and only now affording himself the luxury of looking into her eyes. The deep violet pools that greeted him almost drowned him, he wheezed again.

"Good Boy" She squeezed him a final time, and he gasped, his heart nearly breaking out from his chest. He slammed down on the brakes. to his surprise she didn't seem affected by the sudden stop. She shifted in response, putting a leg either side of him, straddling his waist. She pushed the seat down with her powers and the back fell flat, dropping them both down on top of each other. He hadn't blinked in quite a while. "You want me badly don't you?" She asked, smirking at his eager response.

"Yes!" He moaned as she leaned her head closer, he didn't move, she was in control, he was docile, tame.

"And I want you" Her lips brushed against his as they spoke, his heart leapt to his throat. "It's going to happen no matter how hard we try to resist it" The car started moving again, controlled by Raven's telepathy, it shot through the streets at a high speed, barely dodging obstacles and citizens that wound up in its path.

"I guess!" He shouted, breathing loudly, chest heaving, eyes darting up and down her, eager for her.

"I'm going to do amazing things to you Garfield, I'm going to make you feel sensations you've never even dreamed of" She murmured as she gently kissed him, he couldn't kiss back, he was still frozen. Her hands moved up and down his body, forcefully holding him down, her legs locked around him, prisoner. She continued to softly kiss him, then biting his lip playfully she lifted herself slightly. "Is that what you want?"

"No! It's what I NEED!" He groaned kissing her back forcefully, he attempted to grab her with his arms but her hands caught him at the wrist and held him down, she returned his advances gratefully, moaning into his mouth as their bodies writhed against each other. After a few seconds she broke off and lifted herself once more.

"I'm going to make you mine, and you're not even going to be able to think about another woman when I'm through with you!" She grunted, her voice strengthening with each word.

"Yes please!" He shouted in return, if she hadn't bee holding him down he would have leapt up out of pure adrenaline.

"But not today" She sighed, loosening her grip, and rolling off of his rigid form. She opened the driver side door of the T-car and climbed off of him and into the Titans garage. Beast Boy didn't even know how they had managed to get there, unless the car had developed sentience in the last hour. Which considering the strangeness of exactly what just happened, was not unlikely.

"Guh... What?!" He groaned.

"Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, maybe not even this year." She continued, nonchalantly, old Raven completely returned. Beast Boy could only stare with his mouth wide. "But one day" She said, once again raising her voice, she turned back to the now sitting up Beast Boy, and put a finger to his forehead. "And until then, you should remember who owns whom in this relationship." She licked her lip and he could only nod, slowly, defeated. She turned and walked away. "You're taking me to the opera tomorrow night" She called absent-mindedly. "Turandot, you made a great choice". As the garage door closed Beast Boy simply lay there, his mind reeling.

Raven remembered her mothers words as she floated through the halls of the Tower towards her room and a cold shower. "You have to dominate them, you have to make them docile, you have to have them dancing to your tune before you can trust them to behave themselves, and to trust yourself in waiting"

Two hours later, Cyborg stepped into the garage, curious as to why the lights had been left on, and was shocked to find a strangely zombified Beast Boy lying down in the T car, his seat having been rolled backwards to lie flat.

"Um... B, why are you still in the car?" He nervously asked, unsure if he would like the answer.

"...I think I'm in love."
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Re: Rated L for 'Lime'! It's "My Pet"!

Post by Laughing_Man on 9/27/2009, 8:24 am

Pet

Four years passed.

Four long years came and went. After just one week Beast Boy had lost count of the amount of times he had to restrain himself when he was having 'private time' with Raven. Every time he thought he was going somewhere she didn't want, or perhaps moving to quickly, he would simply stop as if hinted from some telepathic message from her. There was none. The message was purely from the 'lessons' she had given him, times when she would dominate and control him, just to tell him, to warn him without words, of their unique situation.

After one year, they seemed to have finally figured out exactly what was acceptable and what was not. To Beast Boy's delight, the 'acceptable' category was a lot larger than the 'not'. They also reached the point that Beast Boy was allowed to sleep in her bed with her, however, the rules for the bed were different to everywhere else (for obvious reasons), actions were much stricter there, which Beast Boy dared not to question. Their teammates, strangely, did not question their new sleeping arrangements. Cyborg of course made a few jokes, and Robin made a few changes to the Titan Tower defense formations to account for his new starting point, but nothing else.

During the second year, things changed once more.

---

"Check" With a small click Beast Boy placed the knight and smirked at Raven. She just looked at him impassively, having been letting him win for the last twenty minutes was getting boring. She would allow him to get to where he was sure he was going to be victorious, and then she would make one swift move to break him. They were sat at a small table just left of the kitchen, the large screen of the T.V. just in view, with Raven facing it and Beast Boy facing her. Robin was on the couch channel surfing, Starfire and Cyborg had gone shopping for brick-a-brack and assorted useless objects, a practice Robin disagreed with on principle.

Raven bored, reached forward and took the knight with a bishop. Beast Boy then smiled at her widely than before, earning himself a curious look.

"Bored?" He asked.

"No, I'm impressed how well you're doing." She lied, trying her best to look thoughtfully at the board.

"That's weird, I could have sworn you were letting me win"

"Why would I do that?" She raised an eyebrow in an act of hilariously bad acting, Beast Boy's smirk only grew wider.

"Well last time we played, two months ago, you trashed me 30 times in a row. I thought you felt bad" She smirked at that memory, he had finally had enough of her playful mocking of her intelligence, which he claimed to be not nearly as vast as she claimed, and challenged her to a battle of wits. The whole team had made an occasion out of it, with small flags for who they rooted for (Cyborg and Starfire on Beast Boy's side, Robin on Ravens). Raven had won in two moves.

She had moved a pawn, and Beast Boy another pawn to counter it. From there an empty space existed diagonally from his king, and Raven used the space left for her bishop to move it in a position threatening the king. And that was it. Over and done.

Beast Boy wasn't stupid, it would never have happened normally. Raven had taken the game off of the board, and used their real life situation to his advantage. She had come out dressed in an unbelievably small tube top and shorts. When she moved she leant over way more than was needed, and did her best to push her arms towards each other and tease him with her cleavage. Ten minutes later, when Beast Boy stopped staring and realized it was his turn, he made that mistake. As soon as everyone realized that yes, she had won, she immediately retreated and changed back into her usual attire.

"I mean, O.k I was a little distracted, but that was basically cheating! And that doesn't count as a real win since you cheated." He moaned, moving another piece. She repaid in turn.

"Well there's no rule that the battle has to stay on the board" She winked at him and moved her queen.

"You're right, there isn't. Which is why I've let you do this. You aren't gonna let me win, I know that. You never do. But you're letting me get close just to take it away. You've been doing that a lot lately." He turned serious, and Raven let her concentration break for just a moment. "You think I'm still as bad as before, well, since we share a room now I've been able to read through all your chess books, and you're cockiness has just sealed your fate. Checkmate" He said, and moved his Rook. It took Raven a few seconds to realize that she had left herself so open in her confidence Beast Boy was not smart enough to beat her. She hadn't noticed the ways he could take advantage of her from those positions.

"You..." She seethed, speaking through her teeth. Not supposed to happen. Never supposed to happen.

"Aww come on Rae, you should have known better than to try and control me like that." He smirked again, leaning on the board with his elbows.

"My room." She stated quickly. Making sure to speak low enough that Robin couldn't here.

"What?"

"My room. Now." She stood up and began to walk out. Her pet had crossed the line and tried to regain control, that couldn't be allowed. Beast Boy stood up with her, and smirked at her, knowing exactly what was to come.

"Guys!" Robin shouted, stopping her, Beast Boy turned around, slightly disappointed that Roin had delayed what was no doubt going to be one of Raven's 'lessons' for him. He made a mental note to get back at him later. What was on the screen wiped his mind clean. There, in big bold letters, were the words 'TITAN LOVE CHILD?'

---

As it turned out, some woman had gone to the news with a story of how her and Beast Boy had spent a 'wild night of passion' and she had been left with his child. The news reporters had a field day, using it to stir up all kinds of questions about the cities heroes and their behavior. The child was nearly two years old, but no-one seemed to wonder why it had taken her this long to go to the media. The child of course, as most assumed it should have been, was green. Almost immediately after the report ended, Raven had gone to her room. Alone.

For a month, she refused to come out and see Beast Boy. She just couldn't bear to look at him. She didn't truly believe the story, but as always, a small niggling suspicion existed in the back of her mind. Robin spent weeks in detective-mode sorting out the mess, Cyborg managed to get a DNA-test going. The baby, thankfully, was not their teammates.

Eventually the full story was revealed. A pair of holiday makers had a similar incident to the one that birthed Beast Boy, and after their baby was turned green, returned to the city. Then they found that caring for their freak of a child was too much, and had dumped it. The woman had found it, and realizing opportunity, immediately claimed it as her own. For a month, everything the tower became awkward, although they knew their teammate would never do such a thing, there was initially no other possibility for how another green child had come into the world. Then, once it was all been sorted out, there was much apologizing and celebrating. Well, for everyone except Raven, who was still unable to leave her room. Eventually she was able to open the door, and the first words out of her mouth were "I'm sorry"

"Sorry for what?" Beast Boy asked, inside rejoicing that she had finally opened the door to him.

"For this, I should have known you would never-... I'm sorry" She didn't look up at him, she just stared at her feet. Beast Boy stepped closer and put a hand on her shoulder.

"Come on, what else were you meant to think? In a way, it's good that you cared so much. If you had just ended 'us' like any sane person would, well..."

"That's not the point! I really thought that because we haven't... That I can't... I thought it made sense that you'd find someone else. Even just for one night, to know." Her lips quivered, shaking uneasily from the words and the thoughts that they brought. She felt his hand move lower across her arm until it reacher her waist, then he pulled her closer and put his arms around her. He stroker her hair and whispered to her.

"You're so cute when you're being stupid"

---

A year passed, and things returned to normal. exactly one year and three months, Raven had started using the L word. The first time Beast Boy heard it he couldn't help himself, and immediately leapt on her, as she lay on the couch. She had said it so innocently, with no gentle reserve or cautious tongue that usually pertained her admissions. It had come from her mouth so softly and naturally it was as if she had been saying it for years. He had been lying away from her, at the other end of the couch, and he had made amusement for himself by pestering her as usual, teasing her about how much she had changed since their first encounter.

"And you even laughed at my fish-sticks joke this morning!" He finished his latest rant.

"That one doesn't count, you stole that joke. It wasn't yours" She replied absentmindedly.

"Oh come on, there's no such thing as original jokes anymore! That's the point of it, if it's funny to you then it's yours to spread! Like funny butter, you're just mad that you're sense of humour's turning like mine" He smiled broadly at that comment, and relished every moment of long-awaited laughter that he drew from her.

"Oh God I hope not" She muttered.

"It totally is!" He cried, flicking a potato chip at her.

"Not." She retorted, using her powers to flip his entire bag of chips onto his head.

"See!?" He moaned, pointing to his head.

"Don't mind if I do" She muttered, taking a chip from his head and eating it, smirking at his solemn indignation.

"And you're not wearing your cloak anymore" At this she raised an eyebrow.

"How does that mean I'm turning like you?" She asked, relaxing slightly, lying on her back across the couch and lifting her feet to rest on Beast Boys lap.

"Well you're so much more open now" He said, idly stroking a hand across the exposed skin of her leg. "Soon you'll be reading comics, and making knock knock jokes!"

"Beast Boy, I'm not turning into you. I'll prove it if you don't stop going on." She shifted again, lifting her hands to underneath her head.

"How?" He asked, smirking.

"I'll do something very mean and very scary" She sarcastically droned.

"I bet you can't"

"What?" She drew her legs off of him, and sat up.

"You can't. You haven't even done anything close to scary in the last year, you haven't been mean in longer." For a moment Raven contemplated her apparently lost reputation. "Now you're just 'sarcasm girl'"

"I will!" She said, sitting on the backs of her legs.

"Try it" He said, doing the same. For a moment they sat there, facing each other. Until Raven began to lose feeling in her ankle, and fell backwards resuming her lying position.

"Sometimes I hate loving you" She grunted, not realising what she had said until Beast Boy's form landed on top of her, wide eyed and full of energy.

"What did you just say?" He whispered, as if he was afraid of the answer.

"Nothing." She immediately replied, and she turned her head to the side to avoid his gaze. She could see his smile widen from the corner of her eyes.

"You said you loved me" He slowly let the words flow, taking his time to make sure she fully heard and understood every syllable.

"Did not" She denied, closing her eyes. They shot open when she felt familiar lips on the side of her neck.

"You did" He murmured against her skin.

"Didn't" She repeated, doing her best to repel the blush spreading through her cheeks.

"Admit it" He said, unleashing his secret weapon, his lips drifted slowly to her weak spot, just below the right side of her jaw, he sucked lightly on the soft flesh and her body shook, euphoric sensations flooding her. She inwardly raged at the fact he was the only person who knew how to do that to her, and even more inwardly, rejoiced at the fact.

"Fine." She spat. Grabbing his head and turning back to face him. "Happy now?" She mocked.

"Very" He honestly retorted, an ecstatic smile plastered across his face. She squinted at him, but he simply remained still. For minutes he was simply lost in that smile, and so was she.

"Well?" She finally asked.

"Well what?" He answered, bemused.

"Don't you have something to say?" She nudged him in the rips with her hands, and realization dawned.

"I love you too" He obediently whispered.

"Good boy" She cooed, patting him lightly on the head.

---

Another year passed. And one day, things changed.

The day started as any other. They all awoke naturally, thankful that there was no need for alarms that day. It was a warm summer evening and the titans were hoping for a relaxing day, with no Villians or superhero worthy crime forecast. one by one they had emerged into the living room, making light conversation with whoever would enter. The first to awake was Robin, as always, and when Starfire awoke soon after she came in to find him sat on the couch, watching cartoons, a bowl of cereal in his lap. Upon greeting her he invited her to join him, where she was introduced to the earth tradition of the 'lazy Sunday'. They both sat there, crunching their cereal and talking of nothing important. Cyborg came in soon after, and joined them as well. Beast Boy entered, and instead elected to make himself a more complete breakfast. He was in the kitchen, cooking his 'signature tofu eggs and bakey' when the doors opened and finally Raven entered.

"Morning everyone" She greeted them all cordially, a rare but not altogether inconceivable event. The three teammates on the couch did not turn their heads, expecting Raven to make her usual tea and join them in due time.

"Morning" They all answered in unison.

"Hey Rae, you know last night whe-..." Beast Boy's voice faded at the end of his sentence, and he stood there dumbstruck as Raven made her tea, smiling to herself, and then turning to smile at him. She giggled when she saw his face, another very rare occurrence.

Raven was stood there, in her usual leotard and cloak. What had shocked Beast Boy was it's colour, it had apparently turned white during the night before. And now that he saw her properly, his brain froze for a moment in dire contemplation. Raven lifted herself to sit on the counter while her teapot heated, kicking her legs lightly and waiting for realization to dawn on him.

"What the-!" Robin murmured, dropping his cereal as the couch shifted and moved beneath him. Starfire and Cyborg had been caught mid-gulp, and were struggling to avoid choking as their seat shot to the side. Robin then turned to see it being pushed by a green bull, before he could react further they had been pushed into the elevator, and the bull kicked the down button to its side, and the doors closed. The three of them sat in shocked silence, then as Starfire opened her mouth to speak, the elevator launched upwards, ejecting them from the tower. As they crashed through the ceiling metal sheets covered the hole they left as the emergency lock down was activated. They landed halfway into the city, and immediately made their way back, under the assumption that Beast Boy had saved them from some unknown attacker, and was now trapped within the tower with whatever began the conflict.

They knew that they would not be able to re-enter in at least three hours, yet decided that waiting outside would be best in case the villain tried to escape. "So much for a lazy Sunday..." Cyborg had remarked in frustration.

---

Six hours later the towers defenses opened, and the three stormed the building to find Beast Boy, broken upon the floor. There did not appear to be any physical damage (a few superficial scratches on his back and chest, as well as some bite-marks across his shoulders and neck), however he was completely physically drained, and his clothes were ripped and torn under the obvious signs of a physical attack. His gasping raspy voice informed them that there was a huge fight, and that he was nearly beat, however managed to 'overpower' them and regain control, eventually defeating them. The shreds and pieces of white fabric the team found around the various rooms in the tower, were revealed by Beast Boy to be part of the villains uniform. Raven, he told them, was resting in her room after the fight, it had 'taken a lot out of her' as he put it, they didn't hear under his breath about 'a lot being put into her too'.
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Re: Rated L for 'Lime'! It's "My Pet"!

Post by Cylor on 9/27/2009, 10:10 am

Hmmm...not bad, but also not great. There are quite a few typos, many missing punctuations, and your characterization (particularly Raven's) is really pretty off, to a large degree. Having said that, your style does show some potential if you can improve on those things.

Oh, one other nitpick: Raven is empathic, not telepathic. She can only sense emotions, she can't read thoughts.

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Re: Rated L for 'Lime'! It's "My Pet"!

Post by Laughing_Man on 9/27/2009, 10:20 am

Cylor wrote:Hmmm...not bad, but also not great. There are quite a few typos, many missing punctuations, and your characterization (particularly Raven's) is really pretty off, to a large degree. Having said that, your style does show some potential if you can improve on those things.

Oh, one other nitpick: Raven is empathic, not telepathic. She can only sense emotions, she can't read thoughts.

Aye, I know it's quite a bad one XD. Hmm, I don't think I said she was telepathic, unless you're referring to the line about her seemingly sending a telepathic message to him, but that was just metaphoric.

I also did both of these chapters on a hangover... So... yeah Razz [/excuses] Smile
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Re: Rated L for 'Lime'! It's "My Pet"!

Post by Cylor on 9/27/2009, 10:32 am

Laughing_Man wrote:Hmm, I don't think I said she was telepathic, unless you're referring to the line about her seemingly sending a telepathic message to him, but that was just metaphoric.
Actually I was referring to the beginning, where you talked about her easily being able to read thoughts.

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Re: Rated L for 'Lime'! It's "My Pet"!

Post by Laughing_Man on 9/27/2009, 12:28 pm

Cylor wrote:
Laughing_Man wrote:Hmm, I don't think I said she was telepathic, unless you're referring to the line about her seemingly sending a telepathic message to him, but that was just metaphoric.
Actually I was referring to the beginning, where you talked about her easily being able to read thoughts.

Ahh that too was just metaphoric, like the same way a poker player can read the thoughts of other people, with someone emotions on tap it'd be pretty easy to guess their emotions Razz

I guess I should have been clearer when writing it Razz oh well, live and learn!
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Re: Rated L for 'Lime'! It's "My Pet"!

Post by Vandal on 9/27/2009, 3:16 pm

This better not be one of your webcomic episode ideas.. Cause I am not drawing this!

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Re: Rated L for 'Lime'! It's "My Pet"!

Post by Laughing_Man on 9/27/2009, 5:14 pm

Mercy wrote:This better not be one of your webcomic episode ideas.. Cause I am not drawing this!

Lol! Don't worry, I'm not this dirty minded! It was a request! D:
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Re: Rated L for 'Lime'! It's "My Pet"!

Post by Vandal on 9/27/2009, 8:34 pm

Laughing_Man wrote:
Mercy wrote:This better not be one of your webcomic episode ideas.. Cause I am not drawing this!

Lol! Don't worry, I'm not this dirty minded! It was a request! D:

Ya XD lol I'm just kidding!

But you guys are working on the story yes?

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Re: Rated L for 'Lime'! It's "My Pet"!

Post by Laughing_Man on 9/28/2009, 7:56 am

Mercy wrote:
Laughing_Man wrote:
Mercy wrote:This better not be one of your webcomic episode ideas.. Cause I am not drawing this!

Lol! Don't worry, I'm not this dirty minded! It was a request! D:

Ya XD lol I'm just kidding!

But you guys are working on the story yes?

We've got our main season arc idea down. We're just deliberating individual episodes and other specifics now Smile
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Re: Rated L for 'Lime'! It's "My Pet"!

Post by Vandal on 9/28/2009, 9:48 am

Laughing_Man wrote:
Mercy wrote:
Laughing_Man wrote:
Mercy wrote:This better not be one of your webcomic episode ideas.. Cause I am not drawing this!

Lol! Don't worry, I'm not this dirty minded! It was a request! D:

Ya XD lol I'm just kidding!

But you guys are working on the story yes?

We've got our main season arc idea down. We're just deliberating individual episodes and other specifics now Smile
Yaaaaaaay!!! :]

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